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kurtofsky

Title: True Colors
Author: Me. a.k.a. mugglerock
Fandom: ATWT (NUKE)
Warning(s): Corn. Major corn.
Rating: PG.
Pairing: Noah/Luke
Spoilers: Up to current and possibly July 3rd time frame.
Category: Slight angst with a happy ending. Pseudo song-fic.
Disclaimer: If I owned these characters, there would sure as hell been more than five kisses over the past year. No ownership to any of the featured characters or song.
Feedback: Please, Sir? May I have some more?

Summary: An unwelcome announcement is followed by some pain, an unlikely meeting, and s surprisingly accurate song.

Author's Notes: This is my first fic of the fandom, but hardly my first fic. I've slowly gotten out of the writing fanfic habit, but this fic just begged to be written. This is in direct relation to this video. The idea wouldn't stop gnawing at my brain. It's sappy. It's unbeta'ed. But I hope it's enjoyed none-the-less.



“When did you decide to join the army?” Luke asked, disappointment and sadness lining his tone.

Noah shifted uncomfortably in his chair in the corner table. He hadn’t intended on going to Yo’s on Gay Pride night, especially with the exponential and excitable crowd milling around in hopes of a chance meeting with Cyndi Lauper. But after he’d moved back into the dorms, it was one of the few places he was able to go in town that didn’t card him when he needed a stiff drink. He found he had been drinking a lot more lately. He would have realized it was in direct relation to the moment he told Luke that they needed to take a break, provided he actually let himself think about it. He was doing everything he could to forget about Luke and the rollercoaster ride they had shared over the last year.

Luke interrupted his train of thought, “You don’t have to tell me. It’s not like it’s any of my business anymore…”

As Luke stood to leave, Noah grasped his arm, “No, no, please sit.”

Luke sighed sadly and looked at Noah expectantly.

“Last week. It was last week that I decided to join. I have a meeting with the recruiter tomorrow afternoon.”

Luke shrugged his hand through his hair, “Well, I know I’m probably setting myself up asking this, but just for curiosity’s sake, why did you decide to join the army?”

Noah let out a mirthless laugh, “That’s a little more difficult to answer.”

“No it isn’t, Noah. It’s actually really easy to answer. You’re not the type of person to do something without a reason. Is it because of your father?”

“No!”

Luke raised his brow in skepticism and asked, barely hiding the sarcasm in his tone, “Really?”

Noah sighed, “Really. It has nothing to do with my father or his expectations.”

“Well, forgive me for being cynical, but considering every decision you have ever made since I met you has been in direct relation to trying to please your father, you can’t really blame me for assuming.”

“Look, I know you don’t have any reason to believe me, but I’m not doing this for my father, or what’s expected of me.” He reiterated with a firmness in his tone.

“Then why are you doing it? I know it isn’t because you’re finally fulfilling some life-long dream. The one constant with you since we met was that you didn’t want to go into the military. So, why, Noah? Why now? It’s just too convenient that you decide to enlist after the Colonel disappears. Is it because of Ameera? I don’t understand why you feel so guilty. You did all that you could, hell, you did more for her protection here than your father did. I mean, she chose to go into protective custody…”

“Because of me…”

“No, Noah! Because she knew that she would be protected in a way that will eventually bring her her freedom and yours!”

Noah sighed, “But now she’s all alone, she won’t know anyone!”

“Noah, she didn’t even know you when you married her! Be realistic here!”

“I don’t want to argue about this, Luke. I know what happened and I know how I feel. My joining the army is the right thing to do.”

Luke shook his head in mild aggravation, “Why, Noah? Why is it the right thing to do?”

“Because maybe I can make up for my father’s mistakes!”

Luke grasped Noah’s hand and sighed, “Oh, Noah.”

Noah pulled away sharply, “Don’t. Just don’t.”

Luke looked down at their now separated hands, “Alright. Fine. But joining the army isn’t going to erase the mistakes of your father, no matter how many good deeds you do. It doesn’t work like that. All you can do is be a good man, something your father was never capable of. And if you ask me, you’re more of a man than your father ever was. I just wish I could make you understand. You don’t have to do this. You don’t have to enlist. You have so many reasons to stay here and live your life the way you actually want!”

Noah looked pointedly at Luke before turning away, “No. I don’t.”

Luke looked taken aback. The pain that statement had caused was evident in his eyes. The pair of them remained silent for a few moments before Luke stood to leave. He pushed in his chair and said quietly, so as not to let his voice quiver, “Go to hell, Noah.”

Noah sat there and stared at his drink as Luke left the bar, trying to let the whole conversation he had just had with Luke wash over him and make him numb.

~

Luke leaned against the wall in the alley, trying to compose himself. He wanted to run back inside and punch Noah dead in the face. Shake him. Make him realize what a complete idiot he was being. But instead, he found himself trying his damnest not to cry, the cold bricks of the wall being his only support. His thoughts rushed as he recalled how the whole stupid night had begun.

Roth had called him and asked him to meet up at Yo’s. He had guilted Luke into showing up because, as one of the first openly gay residents of Oakdale, he had an obligation to attend Gay Pride night, especially when gay icons were to be present. He reluctantly agreed. Roth hadn’t arrived when Luke got there, but when he saw Noah sitting in a lonely corner, despite the dive his heart took, he felt himself being drawn to his ex.

His silent reverie was interrupted by a gentle, “Are you alright?”

Luke looked up to find an extremely well aged Cyndi Lauper, looking at him with sincere concern. He found himself unable to speak. Although he was never really a fan of the woman’s music, she was still an icon. And this icon was in the back alley of Yo’s asking a random gay boy if he was alright.

She laughed sweetly, “Well, from the look on your face, it’s apparent you know my name, what’s yours?”

Luke shook his head and chuckled in embarrassment, “I’m sorry.”

“Sorry? That’s a funny name.” Cyndi replied cheekily.

Luke smiled, “My name is Luke. Luke Snyder.”

“Well, Luke Snyder, you look, if you don’t mind my saying, like someone just ripped your heart out of your chest and go-go danced on it in front of the whole town to really bad techno music.”

He chuckled sadly, “You’re very perceptive, Ms. Lauper.”

“Oh, honey. Call me Cyndi. That’s not even a request.” She smiled and stroked his arm gently, “Did he break up with you just now? Is that why you’re out here?”

Luke looked a little bemused, “How… How did you know I was…”

Cyndi smiled audaciously and giggled, “Are you kidding? You’re behind a bar on a gay pride night! I know I may be a musician, and a blonde one at that, but I’m not stupid.”

Luke laughed, “Fair enough. No, the break-up happened a couple of weeks ago. It’s just something he said tonight,” Luke shook his head, “I’m sorry, I’m sure the last thing you want to do is listen to a gay kid’s sad little story.”

Cyndi moved to sit on a wooden crate and patted the empty space next to her, “If I didn’t want to listen to a gay kid’s sad story, I wouldn’t have asked if you were alright. And I have…” As Luke moved to sit next to her, she looked at her watch, “33 minutes until show time. I’m all ears, kid.”

Luke chuckled. He took a deep breath and suddenly thought of how surreal his life had just become. He was sitting on a crate behind Yo’s, about to tell an iconic musician about his miserable love-life, or lack thereof.

~

Noah drank slowly and deliberately. He tuned out the excited crowd and the sound equipment being set up. He tuned out the raucous applause as a guitarist grabbed the mic and announced the arrival of Cyndi Lauper. When she walked on the makeshift stage prepared for her, Noah looked up. He could barely see her amidst the sea of people crowding around her. He dropped a couple of bills on the table and stood to leave. Noah decided that he should probably go through the back door, seeing as he’d have to navigate through an insane crowd for any other means of escape. Just as he was approaching the door, he stopped at the announcement the blonde woman made.

“This is for one of your boys here in Oakdale. I’m singing this on behalf of Luke, for Noah…”

Noah looked toward the stage in awe as the acoustic strums of a song he had never heard filled the room.

You with the sad eyes
don't be discouraged
oh I realize
it's hard to take courage
in a world full of people
you can lose sight of it all
and the darkness inside you
can make you fell so small

But I see your true colors
shining through
I see your true colors
and that's why I love you
so don't be afraid to let them show
your true colors
true colors are beautiful
like a rainbow

Show me a smile then
don't be unhappy, can't remember
when I last saw you laughing
if this world makes you crazy
and you've taken all you can bear
you call me up
because you know I'll be there

And I'll see your true colors
shining through
I see your true colors
and that's why I love you
so don't be afraid to let them show
your true colors
true colors are beautiful
like a rainbow
.”

Noah looked around the room frantically for Luke. He even pushed through the crowd in the hopes of locating him. After several minutes without success, Noah sighed and had decided that Luke had probably gone home right after he had rightly told Noah to ‘go to Hell’. The brunet gave up his search and headed out the back door as he had originally intended.

Noah closed the door behind him and pointedly stared downwards as he walked through the alley. He bumped into a person as he walked onto the street, “I’m sorry.” He looked up and found Luke staring at him, a sad look in his eyes.

“Luke, I…”

“No, Noah. It’s alright. Have… Have a good evening.”

As Luke started to walk away, Noah grasped his arm and turned him around. “Wait.”

Luke sighed, “What?”

“I… I’m so sorry, Luke.”

Luke wanted to let the apology pass, to accept it and just keep going, but something inside of him just had to be heard. He knew very well that part of him was his heart. “I don’t need you to be sorry, Noah. I need you to be here. To want to be here. And you made it perfectly clear that you don’t.” He sighed sadly, “I love you. There’s a part of me that will always love you, no matter where you go or what you do. But I guess that just isn’t enough for what you need. So, I’m sorry. I’m sorry I wasn’t enough to keep you here. To make you want to try…”

“Luke…”

“No, Noah. I’m going home. Good luck tomorrow.”

As Luke started to walk away, Noah side stepped in front and halted him. He grasped his shoulders and kissed him firmly on the lips. As he pulled away Luke just stared at him as if he’d grown another head.

Noah took a deep breath, “You are enough, Luke. I just don’t think I am…”

“Noah…”

“No, let me finish. I don’t think I am. But I… If you’re willing to… Damn. I’m no good with words. That’s your thing. I just wish I could figure this out. I don’t want to leave. To leave you, I just don’t know what else to do.”

Luke caressed Noah’s face gently with his hand, “Why can’t we try and figure it out together?”

Noah took a deep breath, “Would… Would you be willing to try again?”

Luke smiled and pressed his lips tentatively to Noah’s. He had no intention of taking it further. The simple kiss was enough answer he needed to give. They took each other’s hand and started walking with no particular direction.

After several minutes of companionable silence, Luke couldn’t resist asking the question that was plaguing him, “What made you change your mind so suddenly, Noah?”

The brunet shrugged and replied simply, “Something I heard really sang to me.”

The End

Additional Author's Notes: I know, it's atrocious. But it had to be written. Now I can go back to anonymously perusing the community and intarwebz like everyone else.

Comments

Aww, love! This is just what I needed! :]
Heh. I'm so glad you liked it! Thank you!
kurtofsky

November 2010

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